Monday, August 26, 2013

I have this super annoying measuring stick...

Hey Family,

This week was crazy!!! And by that I mean nothing new really happened. One week of the transfer left, I think we are both staying.........The next transfer is 10 weeks long. Do not ask me how I am going to survive finding for that long. I do not know.
I brought the card reader...SO I CAN SEND PICTURES OF VESZPRÉM! I hope it works. Haven't tried it here yet.

Alright, I guess we could start with Sportsz Nap. WE COULD GO! WHOAH. We got out of our program early. Unfortunately I was STUFFED. I have decided that nothing I do here can prevent me from the onslaught of Jaaron's impending weight comments. I am always stuffed because people are always getting offended. Let me give you a run down of what happened at our last "Dinner" appointment:
( For our purposes only we will call this person " The Stuffer".)

Stuffer: " Would you like more food? I noticed you ate really slowly- it is probably because you were really enjoying the food."

Victim: ( I just had 2 huge pieces of pizza from member X and ice-cream for lunch...there is no way...) " Yes, Please. If you could fill me plate up halfway I would be so grateful. "

Stuffer: " You are so polite- take the biggest piece of bacon and I'll just stuff your plate for you. Don't be shy about anything-just help yourself."

Victim: " Thank you...."
 Stuffer: " I made 3 courses...
 Victim: " What th...?
 Stuffer: " And the dessert I invented myself and..
 Victim: " But...I...
 Stuffer: " and I bought you a bag of candies I expect to watch you eat in my living room."
 Victim:" ......."

Stuffer: " Oh, and that is chicken liver...."
( little gagging noise.)

Victim: " I am trying to lose weight?" ( Casual hint.)

Stuffer: " Me too. I do not eat after 3:00. I was just going to watch you two eat.
Alright. Cool.

It was good food. But I really did gag when I hit the chicken liver, I was so full and it took all I had to hold that baby in.  (  I really cannot stand that stuff. My first transfer when I couldn't read the menus and I was too scared to ask the more experienced missionaries I always ended up with something involving chicken liver. They thought I was so weird. )  I just feel like a chunk all the time. Good thing we walk EVERYWHERE.
Anyways so we got out early and booked it over to the park. It was super fun. My companion didn't want to play the first half and that is why I have pictures of myself playing. This is what I get for bragging last week....but we were getting near the time we needed to head home and we decided to go for one last goal. It was getting dark and I had my ward mission leader cornered by a bush and in a panic he boots the ball and just NAILS me in the right eye. Oh, man it hurt bad.  Probably not surprising to you all- I have only gotten nailed in the face a million times already. BUT I SCORED 2! WHOAH.  

I have a pretty little black eye that I use to my advantage while finding. It is weird though, because now every time the lights go out I can't see out of the bottom 1/4 of my right eye. It's just a big grey spot. I am thinking I may have damaged the cones/ rod cells ( Whichever one picks up light in the dark, can't remember for the life of me.) I am calling the mission nurse today, hopefully it is something that will go away in time.
Alright, the pictures I am sending are the views from our balcony. Also, there are a few from the Castle look out.

This week has been better with regard to finding. Our English class is growing! There is a little girl named Dorie that comes and is JUST like Brooke. Last week I helped her play smurfs in class and at the end she ran up and just hugged me. It was super awkward because I am a nun, but also super sweet. I miss Brooker. We tracted into a few people. There was a HUGE Hungarian festival on Tuesday so we had a weird holiday. Apparently they bake large breads...? I didn't hear much else about it.

The weather is getting colder and rainier, yes! We also got to teach an older man and afterwards he gave me a prayer book that was published in 1944. It is SWEET. Keeping that forever.

This week was a little frustrating for several reasons. Not all necessarily related to no investigators but that was definitely a hard part. I just felt like everything that I have been doing is nowhere near perfect. I have this super annoying measuring stick I keep with me and whenever I do anything I take it out and measure myself. It isn't a very fair measuring stick because the point of perfection is unreachable and I haven't hit that point yet. I was thinking in my Greenie Days that by the time I reach " This point" in my mission then I would be a perfect missionary. I think I tend to do that a lot in life too. But it has never come.

 I am snapping that puppy in half and I am adopting the Lord's method, which I think I learned so much about this week. I came home one day, and was just irritated and frustrated. I felt like the days previous I had not accomplished anything, and that the Lord must be becoming impatient with our lack of success, Why wouldn't he be? I was. He was probably sitting there with "his" measuring stick and tallying the amount of times I didn't talk to someone, the times I was scared, the times I thought about my family, or the amount of rejections because people couldn't understand what I said. I wanted to talk to him about it, but I just felt like I couldn't. I knelt down to prayer, but I didn't want to. Yeah, I know that was bad, but how could I pray to someone that measured me like that? Didn't he understand that I was trying? Didn't he understand that I missed my family like crazy, and that I couldn't speak this language as well as my companion, and that I had tried to be obedient? Didn't he see how much I wanted to find people and how I hadn't planned for the little mistakes that kept coming up? Didn't he love me? That was the real question. I just felt so let down, but I stayed on my knees because I had faith he wasn't that kind of person.

Then I had an impression to try talking to Heavenly Father as if I was talking to Dad. So I decided to try that. I pictured Dad and myself in one of our L.A.D.D. s ( long, awkward, dad, discussions- Yeah, I still remember those.) I then tried to tell him what was going on. I told him what had happened in the past week, and how I had honestly tried to do all I could. I told him I was disappointed with myself and that I made mistakes. I was going to start telling him how I was frustrated because I felt it was unfair the way he would judge me on those things and how he needed to just be okay with that because it was all I could do. But I just couldn't. Because I knew he wasn't. Dad was sitting there telling me that he was so proud of me for what I was doing, he was sitting there grinning and laughing about some of the stupid mistakes I made and saying, "Adley, that wasn't even your fault." or " Hey, that was hard, but did you learn from it?" or " You really can't take that so hard on yourself." It was a very interesting lesson for me. 

There is not such a thing as a ruler. A perfect person existed, but even the greatest sons and daughters of God in the history of time have never paralleled his flawless life. After this I could talk to Heavenly Father and I started by thanking him for his mercy. Something we all need from him, and from ourselves. I am starting to hate the saying. " Do your best." I will tell you why, because your best is an indefinite measurement and we are humans, definitely. My best measurements don't originate from me but from a higher power and I give what I can-yes, sometimes that is not a lot nor would I consider it my best, but I can depend on a little divine intervention to make up any difference. "My best" in all actuality is only considered acceptable when coupled with borrowed strength because if not it is indefinite and ineffectual.

I am so grateful for a Heavenly Father that doesn't measure me, like I think the human race is prone to measure ourselves. He is our Heavenly Father, and which one of us has an Earthly Father who would not be merciful to our shortcomings or give us a second chance?  Think of all those times Dad makes us haul logs! What if we volunteered to clear the whole forest? Think:  would he be mad if we got sick one day, worked slower another, got hit by a cold mud ball one of our sisters threw because she thought it would be funny and cried all the way home? ( HAHAHA, had to throw that one in there sis. Sorry about that. Seemed funnier in my head.) No. He's grateful we are out there working. Dad you are the best, and Heavenly Father is the best too.

Those are my thoughts this week. There were tons of others. There never is enough time.
Well I have thoroughly enjoyed reading all of your letters. I have inherited a very fine fam. Let me comment a little on what I read:

Granny Erickson: YOU BOUGHT A HORSE. You bought a horse. a horse. and. a wagon. Why couldn't I be there for your incredible random purchase? Do you know how much I respect your decision?!?!?! There is a reason we were not sisters....we might have gotten a little crazy. Was it a stray horse? I definitely would have sided with you on that one. ( Mom, can you bold that last part and then send it to dad.)

Jaaron: YOU FIGHT THAT SYSTEM BOY! Fight down to that last purple, pudgy, Obama grape! ( I am trying to remain relatively calm in this little cáfe, but boy the nerve of that man.......I'll give him a well balanced diet. A couple of slabs of meaty justice, veggies, encased in a knuckle- I am on a mission, I am on a mission.) I think you should strike or something. I can't believe people are buying into that. Siggggggggggghh. I am proud of you. That is crazy that you are driving? Be careful and..... have you been on a date? whistle. Man, you are a babe.

Péter ( Payter-as they would say over here.) - If I ever have to see another sketched picture of you with long hair I am going to cry....and maybe throw up a little in my mouth. 15 turkeys? What the? Hey remember when we saved those drowned turkeys with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation because we accidentally left the water bucket open? ( Oh man, dad would have killed us if they had died.) Yeah, those were the days. Nothing like a the "kiss of life" to save the ones you love. hahaha. Gross voltunk.

Granny F: You have been ALL over the place lately! Did you get my pictures? I got the coolest letters about Dad from Grandma. I know all the " Rob secrets". More to come, more to come.....

Adrienne: My monochromatic friend. I met someone here with " The tooth" his name is C. and when the sun hits him just right I can see the little gap that reminds me of an old friend in Missouri and her miraculous journey to finding the missing pieces in her life. hahaha. Alright, just kidding :) How did the operation go? Were you chipmunky for any period of time? I want pictures! You looked stinking gorgeous in yellow. Stay away from men, you might be called to one of the newer missions the " Engaged mission". Sounds a little intense szerintem.  ;)

Nathan: HEY. Haven't heard from you in a while bud? Mi újság veled? Here let me help you pronounce this so you can serve here one day too. ME- Ooey-shag vel-ed ( What is new with you?) Cool. Fluent you are. How is Spanish coming? I need to get a picture of you, the last one I saw you were holding a Seagull? How did you catch that thing? Maybe instead of the fly whisperer you can be the seagull whisperer? Think about it.
P.S.  Míklós ( Me klOSH)  is how you say Michael in Hungarian. Thought you would appreciate that.

Brookie!!! Alright, baby. What is going on? I am sorry I haven't sent a lot of letters! I am trying but I am a poor person out here. So I will right now kiss this computer and they should get there when mom reads this to you. Did you feel that on your cheek? It was probably a fly, but we can pretend it is a kiss, okay? Write to me and tell me about your Baptism? What dress are you wearing? Who is taking your pictures? Wow. So BIG. Nagy a hugam. ( My big little sister- Hug means little sis.) Alright WUV SISSA FOWIES

Oh man. I always go out of order and then I forget who else is in our family....

Oh right, Carissa. ;)

Carissa: Hey Beautiful. I am sorry growing up stinks. I am feeling that too. When you first get out on your mission it  is seriously like being born again. You are just a cute little Greenie- no none expects you to know anything and then one day you wake up and you are opening a city all by your lonesome. It is crazy. I am living another life. I die next July. Are you seriously picking me up...because I am so down- down like a hound. Also, I saw a crane today and for whatever reason it made me think of you on a skyride. HAHAHAHA. Can that be my birthday present this year? Can someone record that? Thanks. Hey, Life is rough. Hang in there Paly. ( Not sure if that is how you spell that but we can run with it.) You are going to do great, because you are smart, capable, and a kissy face....I mean. Where did that come from? Oh, right. What is going on with you and Natey-boy? Kaptam a képeidet. Got your pictures. You have some explaining to do missy.

ThomElder Fowers: Just about forgot. Where is your letter this week, man? I missed it? How is Coli ( haha. Get it? Instead of Cali, it's Coli- except I am pretty sure that is a nickname for a disease pioneers contracted. Hmmmm....maybe not.) How is that family you all have been teaching? WRITE ME. "I need to hear these words" ( Esme- Emperor's New Groove.) Is it gorgeous? I had to paint a picture once of Colorado, and it was gorgeous. I hope you are doing okay! Remember you are changing lives! (your own included.)

Shawn&Kara:  Enjoy marriage!

Alright. Mom and Dad and I am writing you separately. You two are special.
Alright, That was huge. I better get some good thoughts on that baby. Peter, your pictures were awesome.

Love you family.
7 MONTHS DOWN!!!! Booyah.
Love Sis. Fowers

Friday, August 23, 2013

I think Heavenly Father plugs my ears...

THEY are so cute! Ahhhh man........ Adorable.

Man, Mom. We have to figure something out. Your reception was stinking cute though. You are so organizedly talented.

Alright, what to tell you all about.  This week was super great, and super the same. I smiled super hard at everyone we tracted, it was my goal for the week. My companion and I have this ongoing joke about my inability to understand when someone is insulting us. Sometimes I really cannot understand anything these people say-it is interesting, sometimes I can understand everything and then other times I can't understand anything. So my companion and I were talking to this old man and the conversation was going for a really long time and I just kept telling him about our message. My companion kept giving me weird looks while I was testifying. Little did I know the whole time he was insulting us and I was going on about why we needed prophets. He even insulted her at one point and right after that I started to tell him about the Plan of Salvation or something. hahahaha. When the converstaion ended my companion was pretty much fuming with rage  and I thought he was ready for baptism. SO FUNNY. I did give him a Restoration pamphlet though. One day he is gonna change.

 I think Heavenly Father plugs my ears when people say things like that. He is looking out for me. I am so grateful for him. We also tracted into this house where the Lady peeped her head out the window and told us we were a cult and that she didn't want to see our faces and to get out of her area. I didn't understand that either and just really smiley said Thanks so much, have a great day! I think she was a little taken back. Maybe it changed her view of us. Who knows. The point is, I love people. I am developing this incredible love for everybody.

We got let into 2 houses this week. One was this super old Nani who basically gave us cookies and told us she was going to die in her religion. The other gave me a stained glass picture of a monkey eating a banana. Yeah, I rolled in the goods this week. I honestly did try to share my testimony with them both, but we do not think they will want to meet again. That is okay, at least I have a happy monkey. I am calling him Béla. He is a cutie.

We did lots of tracting and lots of streeting. 20 hours of finding this week Crazy huh? Would have been more but we had Zone conference.  Yeah. Boldog vagyok.  I have to tell you about Sportsz Nap though!
So every week on Friday they have all the Single adults get together and play soccer and we take our investigators and then play SOCCER. You cannot imagine how excited I was for this night. We had this 17 year old boy, Z. from Angolóra that wanted to come so we could go!

We got there and it was the Elders, Z.( our missionary leader), Á. ( new convert), C.( The Elder's investigator, and also plays goalie for a team here in Hungary) And M. a member. We were the first sisters in forever so they let us choose teams. It was SO fun. I ended up switching teams because the other team was losing, and the other team was getting super cocky. So we start just encouraging each other and then we were on FIRE. I think on the mission your skills are amplified. I scored 4 times on C. and I stole the ball from these huge players everytime they dribbled down the field! Then I had an open break straight up the field and I could hear Elder B. gaining and he goes past to steal the ball, he gets it and then I take it right back and he goes flying! I mean like does 3 flips on the ground. All the Hungarians and Elders were like: WHOOOAH SISTER FOWERS. ( Then I used my strength to rip my blouse....that is a quote from Nacho Libre by the way.) It was way cool. It was super cool and now all the men in the ward fear me. Hahaha. The only bad part is after the game they were all in love with me. I had to restrain a few of them from giving hugs or sticking my head in their armpits and I got asked on a date by Z.- the awkwardness of the life of a nun.

BUT I love SPORTSZ NAP. Too bad we can't go this week :( We have a meeting.
hanks for letting me brag. You can delete that after you read it in a church talk or something ;)

Also, I packed a stick of Kolbász for my hike today. NOOOOOOO. I am becoming a Hungarian. Seriously, though. All the jokes in my district revolve around my consumption of the tubed delight. Not my fault though. The Elders in the apartment before us left like 5 sticks in the freezer. What was I supposed to do with all that packaged goodness? I do not have money so I just use it to flavor stuff. It may have gotten to the point where everyone is calling me a kolbász fiend- but I am not going to openly admit that. ( And don't tell Jaaron, he make some saucy remark about my weight.)
And yes....we went on a 6 mile hike today. Nothing like taking your P-day to do the same thing you do every other day. Walk. Thank you Ward Missionary who planned it and decided to bring a date on it. Lemon juice, and paper cuts.

(Alright. Things are so good here. I am a little tired of being Missionary mom. I do not like being the one that always tracts the time or is always the one people have to beg to do something they know is not missionary appropriate. They should know. I am struggling with that a little bit. I cannot afford to be disobedient though. I am here representing my family and the Lord. I need to find people. I need to be ready when the Lord is ready to give me people. I am trying, I am finding out a lot about compromise and trying to not cause contention. It is interesting, this missionary life. But I feel like I am learning alot about marriage....weird huh? I have decided I cannot change people. I can inspire, but not change. That is why I have to marry someone that is right beside me.

I love you all so much. I love the fact that you all love me too. That is great. A mutual love. Alright, I will be here working. Keep up the work at home too. I love Jesus Christ and I love Heavenly Father.

How was the party Jaaron? ( Wink, wink)

Sorry I have not replied to you all. Brooke babe, I love you. Adrienne. I think you are fancy.  Peter you are saucy. Carissa you look ravishing in puce. Nathan, I just love ya boy. Jaaron, Don't read this whole letter, you will think less of me. Mom you are just amazing and you know how to do everything. Dad, you would appreciate all the times I brag about you here and also how charitable you are to stray animals.

Love Sister Fowers

Monday, August 12, 2013

Hey little girl, have a drink...


Alright. That is a dang, cute reception! Who came? Can I not hold mine in church. I want one on our front lawn.....Please. I love the ice-cream/cookie idea. Stinking cute.
Flood? What? That is crazy. Good thing we built our house upon a rock- or at least higher up. I would prefer the flooding to drought though. The weather here has only been 106 F, so no big deal. I am nagyon píros ( super red). The other day the weather cooled down a lot though. We are the only companionship in the mission with AC. tehe.

Did everyone read about our incredible brother, Elder Fowers? I love him. Glad he's ours now.

I heard a saying this week that I can relate to.
American missionaries learn how to teach,
South Americans and African missionaries get the converts,
and Hungarian missionaries get humbled. HAHAHAHA.

Not true but felt like it this week. We lost our only investigator. We are still streeting and tracting a TON.
The Elders left us a few people to teach though....

One  of them was an older man that was drunk when we went over. He told us to come on in, and we just asked if someone else was home and he started to get really mad that we didn't trust him, so he went over to his neighbors house ( she was also supposed to meet with us the next day) bangs on her door and tells her the missionaries are here. She screams she doesn't want to meet and in the mean time he is trying to convince us his hands are clean. Then he went into his house to get something and we booked it out of the apartment. hahahahahahaha.....Thank you Elders. Also, the other man they were meeting with was set on making us drink alcohol, and he started crying when we didn't accept his "gift". He was 78 or so. He said he couldn't hear our high voices so we should just listen to him. Maybe not. We haven't been back since. He was super nice, just probably can't teach him.

We also got to go up to Buda for Interviews with president. A member drove us up- and might I add- just about killed us. We got to drive through these huge open fields. It was a 2 hour drive so I just imagined being in Missouri and taking a drive out in the country. Hungary and Missouri look pretty similar in the country areas. I miss good ole' MO.

I have learned so much this week. I have asked to Lord to try and teach me how to teach. He definitely did. I was in a lesson with this lady that we planned on committing to baptize ( Yes, this is also the one that recently dropped us.) I kept trying to analyze when I should commit her and to find the perfect lead in. During this little analyzation I wasn't listening as well as I could have been to the investigator and to the Spirit. We were coming to the end and I was getting ready to ask, I didn't feel like it was a good time, but we were about to leave and I had just read a talk about always asking people to be baptized so I thought I should just do it. I wanted to do it. Then I tried to open my mouth and nothing came out. Nothing. I could not form a single word. I spit out a few phrases but she could not understand and I couldn't either. IT was humbling. I got out of the lesson and was trying to figure out what happened. I felt rebuked. And honestly that is what happened. I was laying on my bed at night trying to think what went wrong and I remembered I had asked the Lord to make me a better teacher. He had silenced me in the moment I had ceased to be one. I have never been so grateful for the Lord's rebuking. I have realized that my plans and my desires for these people are only accomplished when aligned with the Lords. Amazing, huh?

I am changing so much! I cannot believe it. I would normally die if someone tried to rebuke or correct me. Now I just shoulder it and learn from it. It is changing everything. I am learning so much about myself. I would normally not be very bold with people, but I really turned this guy down when he offered us some alcohol, I tell people when something is wrong, and I express my opinions, and I do what is right. I am learning to be true to myself. I have never felt like a powerful person. I just feel like down here on my knees I am watching the Lord create this person I didn't know could exist. I love her! She is great! She is everything I ever wanted to be! I can't wait to see what he does with her next!

I was talking to my companion about this but I think as people we try to build these really impressive outward appearances and inside we are just these people who are afraid of who they are because they might not be perfectly acceptable to others. It is amazing to know that we can build off of what the Lord thinks of us. Man. This is great. You guys have to try this. 

OH! And Carissa. They have called this girl here as the missionary nurse. She turned in her papers and included the fact that she was a nurse. She still does normal missionary things, but if anybody needs anything they call her up. So.....yeah...........

What else? Oh, oh, OH! I am understanding people better! The people here have a really hard time understanding me. Humbling. BUT getting better.

We had a baptism here. The Elders have this super sweet old lady, Gizi Nani who got baptized on Saturday. We do not have fonts in the churches here. So we went to a nearby hotel and baptized her there. It was in a jacuzzi. Yeah, I know. Super Jealous vagyok. I can't wait to talk to you all in December!
We also visited the castle here in Veszprém last Monday. It is so gorgeous! I took a ton a pictures. There is this giant sculpture of a king and queen that look out over all of Veszprém. There is a huge rock ridge in the middle of the city with a crucifix on it, and you can see the mountains in the distance. So beautiful. This is going to be a 5 week transfer so I do not know how long I will stay will be hard to go back to the big cities. COUNTRY GIRL. Missing it.

I also found out that July 24th is probably the good ole' release date.

HAPPY 200 days on my mission!

Alright, cool. Well today, we are going to spend with the elders getting foot massages. Apparently one of the member at church gives all missionaries free membership. It is all electronic, don't worry  nobody will be touching my perfectly preserved missionary feet.

I love you all. I think we have reached that point where even the strongest writers are dropping off. That's okay. Those that endure will receive the just deserves.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAARON! I CAN NOT BELIEVE IT. YOU CAN DATE? That is scary. Good thing we don't have to worry about that factor of you turning 16, though. Hahaha. Alright, kidding. Be a gentlemen and don't forget to tape the Strength of Youth standards to the dashboard of whatever car you drive. ( Girls will be impressed.) Hey love you. Glad I could know you. Also, glad you wrote last week. Also, glad that you are still alive. kinda. Stay sassy. Love ad

Alright. it is time............We are going to FIND PEOPLE THIS WEEK.!!!!!! WHOAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love Sister Fowers

P.S. I am sending a picture of all the kids that chased us to our apartment in Kispest. Jozséf, Bogi, and Roli. Hungarian to love them. My favorite, Bóglárka.

Monday, August 5, 2013

"Come to the edge," said Heaven...

Wow. This week was crazy.

The wedding pictures are ADORABLE. I miss you all so much! You are so beautiful and just good people. I really like being in this family. Thanks mom and dad.

So, here I am in Veszprém. We got here Wednesday night. It was the most beautiful train ride! I never knew Hungary was this beautiful! There were fields and fields of sunflowers ( yeah, I died) , hay bays in golden fields, and the most beautiful hills with rock faces on just one side. It was unbelievable. I wish I could describe it better. Then we got here. You know those little European cities you see in the movies? The ones with little streets of cobblestone, and lots of hills, outside restraunts ( Forgot how to spell that.), and so many Catholic temples.  From our window you can see all of the church spires, and the mountains in the distance. It is a dream. The Balaton-or Hungarian sea is really close so there tons of tourists and the prettiest sculptures.

I took pictures but I can't send them because I do not have my cord with me. Our apartment is sooooo nice. I have never been in a nicer place here. It is the pent house of a building no one lives in. it has a see through floor, a jet bath, and workout equipment. ( AND A WORKING OVEN!) It is incredible. There is AC too. It used to be the Elders apartment. :)

So we got here and the Elders have no investigators for us. The Area Book was a mess. You know what that means? Finding 24/7. I am tanner than a cowhide right now. We sweat and find, and find and sweat. We get home exhausted. My feet look like hobbit feet- I could probably could go without  shoes and be okay. It is hard work. I have never been more grateful for Church.

Finding has not been very successful, people are really hard to talk to here. You say missionary and they completely close up. The ones that talk to you are super Catholic. It makes finding pretty difficult. I am so excited to be here though. Now that we are both Senior companions we get to set the expectations for the other sisters coming in.

We follow all rules and I am trying my hardest to give my all to the Lord. Which is a lot harder than I originally thought. Still making mistakes and nowhere near perfect but I am trying.

There is this other poem I memorized, super short:

"Come to the edge." Said Heaven
I said, " No. I will fall."
"Come to the edge." Said Heaven
I said, " No. I will fall."
"Come to the edge. " Said Heaven
I came to the edge. Heaven pushed me.

I think in order for us to experience miracles we have to decide to come to that edge, we have to push ourselves even when things get hard. When we are already on the ground and asked to give more still- that is when the Lord steps into the fight. We cannot experience those miracles without putting all our trust in the Lord. We turn our cheeks and push forward.

This week has been rough. I just really want to share this message. It just seems like no one wants to listen, and I do not think people can understand me. BUT the Lord is leading us. I trust in him, and he is coming. I am on my knees all the time because there really is only one person that can help. I read this incredible talk on The Challenging and Testifying Missionary, it basically talked about how we are here to bring people to Christ and how we can testify to help people recognize the spirit. It is so good. It is by Pres. Alvin something...Can't remember-you should try to look it up.  Basically says that there is one talent a missionary has: To teach with the Spirit. Any other way is contrary to God's will. It is so hard to do that! I always am trying to do it on my own-it just does not work! I am praying to find a way for the Lord to work with my stubborn, little heart.

I just wanted to say that I think anyone that is going to serve a mission or who is praying about it is about to be blessed beyond anything they could have imagined. What a privilege it is to come this close to Heavenly Father.

Funny story. I met a Muslim on the side of the road (Who spoke English, thank goodness!) who said he would be interested in meeting. So we decided we would meet at that corner at 7:00 that night. Well, when we got there that night, he was all dressed up. He thought he was taking us on a date night. Awkward. Then when we got to the cafe I pulled out a Book of Mormon and was showing him the picture of Christ and told him that he was the Son of God- and he very bluntly said, " That is completely not true." He then told us all about his religion. At the end he challenged us to read the Koran. We challenged him to read the Book of Mormon. At least we got free ice-cream.  ( Oh, and he said he would like to visit me in Missouri sometime.)

Needless to say, not a new investigator.

Anyways. This is super weird. I am in an internet cafe and they have music playing. Real world music. Weird.
Also, Jaaron. I would like to get you one, but unfortunately I haven' been able to find them here.....Maybe I can look. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CUTIE!

I love you all. I loved the pictures. Keep up the missionary work out there! I miss you all so much.

Love Sis. Fowers